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[Graham1]

You know he's just teasing Morton! We all love you really!

[Woodsprite]

I think so long as a person states their status at the beginning, it's okay to have a nice mix. I've only had two guys approach me in a chat room...one called himself BlueSteel69 and wanted to know why my cam wasn't on; the other one started messaging me privately and was telling me in about 2 minutes flat how unhappy his marriage was and how he had all this money...I had not even asked!

I'd love to meet a wonderful man some day, but I really don't want to get involved with a married man, I don't care what his circumstance is (I could have that right now if I wanted). I understand that if one is in a remote location and the spouse is okay with it, friendship is good. But there is no way I would want to get personal enough for it to be a threat to anyone, and some people are just born jealous, or I would have more male friends than I do!

For me marriage is sacred, and I'd be pretty upset if my beloved were on the internet seeking friendship. I had a DH who spent more time on line than with me, and I would never want to go there again. He was not good with people, so he took a bit of effort to understand, but after a few years of me being the only person who really cared about him, he got bored with me and looked elsewhere for excitement. Not that he cheated on me in the common sense, but he liked to snag women into verbally abusive relationships online, starting flame wars and getting other geeks to gang up on them, putting them down for their supposed lack of intelligence, for silly things like spelling mistakes or just not understanding something technical very well, in open public chat rooms and forums. Running ladies out of chat rooms was like some sort of victory for him.

But there was one gal who really triggered him when she said couldn't believe he was married, because of the way he treated people in their forum. Sadly he started bragging to me about his 'witty' attacks on her, because she just wouldn't quit the forum, and he wanted me to see how stupid this woman was. I saw quite clearly she was quite a nice young lady, just not endowed with an IQ of 182 like he was, and he was being very cruel and biting, for no reason except that she was a nice young woman trying to enjoy the forum. It was really horrible to see what he was doing, and God help me, I had the audacity to point this out to him.

It turned out he had some real problems he'd been hiding, and when they started coming out after 9 years of a fairly good marriage, he wanted a divorce; so God bless him, he's out of my garden. But I have wondered if he hadn't gotten so fixated on 'socializing' online, might things have been different.

Anyway, that's my mixed feelings about married people online.

[morton1]

hi woodsprite, I think he would have found another way to be the nasty man he was if not on line,good job he never got to meet me he would have thought he had died on gone to heaven am that thick lol .but your well shut of him.but there are lots of married men an women on this site an they do want to make friends an should not be judged because they are married.

[dizzy63]

I have to agree with Morton - it seems to me he had a nasty streak anyway and being online just helped him bring it to the fore - was he brave enough to be like this face to face??? Oh my, I would love to have come into contact with him as I would have been in my element to bring him down!!!!!
I can only speak for myself here - but - I see nothing wrong in making friends online and I also think it is only fair to realise that there are people that can't get out and about to make friends!!! I have made some great friends here , some married and some single - I enjoy the banter and warmth that goes along with it!

That all being said - we are all entitled to our opinion and should as adults be able to respect this!! Please don't put us all in the same box if you have had a bad experience  - as I have already said in this thread earlier - most of us have been a victim at some point, me included but please don't keep the blinkers on and miss what is going on around you. I also believe marriage is sacred - but I also believe that trust is another big factor and by having friends of the opposite sex shouldn't be such a big issue!!

[wolfie13]

hi everyone, was reading these and i have a thing id like to share, i was married, been cheated on, and i lost ALL trust in females, i see now that was wrong, and i am trying to get the trust back, not an easy job really, but that is MY goal, not the ladies,
if it wasnt for me being left with 3 younger children to bring up (with the help of 3 elder kids) i dont know what i would have done, turned to drink? drugs? theft? who knows,
I just want to say, this site is only going to help me, i can feel it in the very short time i have spent on here, and the feelings you people show openly in your letters on here,
so i say, treat every person with respect, and remember we all have feelings and emotions, dont let idiots spoil what we may find in others words,
thank you for taking time to read this, i just felt i had to say something, if it was only thank you.

[morton1]

hi everyone, was reading these and i have a thing id like to share, i was married, been cheated on, and i lost ALL trust in females, i see now that was wrong, and i am trying to get the trust back, not an easy job really, but that is MY goal, not the ladies,
if it wasnt for me being left with 3 younger children to bring up (with the help of 3 elder kids) i dont know what i would have done, turned to drink? drugs? theft? who knows,
I just want to say, this site is only going to help me, i can feel it in the very short time i have spent on here, and the feelings you people show openly in your letters on here,
so i say, treat every person with respect, and remember we all have feelings and emotions, dont let idiots spoil what we may find in others words,
thank you for taking time to read this, i just felt i had to say something, if it was only thank you.

HI wolfie 13,an welcome to this site, its took some guts to write an share what you have been through.an there lots of nice honest people on here I hope you get to meet some of them who would gladly help you help you to reach your goal.x

[wolfie13]

Thanks Morton, gotta say i read a few posts on different boards whateva you call them lol, and all i see is friendly nice people, so i know it wont take too long to make friends and if i can help anyone along the way then great,
thanks,

[ThunderingDave]

I'm disabled and divorced live alone and I am very lonely. Yes I have friends, some very close, but no one I can really COVERSE with. I cannot get a "real" friendship over the Internet. All the "friendship" sites dont cover it. That's my rant of the week!

[Graham1]

Hi Dave. I sympathise with your situation but things are afoot to get local groups set up in various areas, including yours, with a view to getting members together for a meet up. Members have already applied to be Local Moderators and they should be posting notices soon about possible meet ups. I agree that its difficult to have a "real" friendship or relationship online and its good to meet others in person!

[Rocky2]

Thanks Morton, gotta say i read a few posts on different boards whateva you call them lol, and all i see is friendly nice people, so i know it wont take too long to make friends and if i can help anyone along the way then great,
thanks,

Hi I was reading through this subject and feel i had to comment in some way, I subscribed to a 50 + club because i would make friends with people of my age +.
I am shore we are all mature and have had our own different experiences,  But this modern way of life makes it all a new world. 
After all this is a Club ah, and not consider it to be a dating or pick up site, I am looking forward to chatting or making comments,
So let me get back to the subject matter, If we are to believe someone who subscribes to this site Married , Divorced, Single, or Other, we have a choice to decided whether we befriend them or not ah.

 I hope this is making sences, it is my first comment, but had to share it, thanks to all who welcomed me to this site, seems we are all going to have fun n  love it .
Rocky  

[sierra103]

I would like every women older than 55 to read up on semantic dementia and the effect it has on the care giver before generalizing on married men. I understand it goes both ways.
Some of us on this site should have a more open mind! Sometimes one can be very lonely in a married relationship, yet respect their partner and their responsibility to this person.

[chacha65]

I would like every women older than 55 to read up on semantic dementia and the effect it has on the care giver before generalizing on married men. I understand it goes both ways.
Some of us on this site should have a more open mind! Sometimes one can be very lonely in a married relationship, yet respect their partner and their responsibility to this person.

I don't quite understand the "women older than 55" rational for reading up on semantic dementia ..... did I miss something?  It is a harsh fact that in our world of 50+,  dementia and related diseases such as Alzheimers is a fact of life, it can grasp a loved one at a very early age and the impact on the caregiver and family in general can be extremely lonely!  .... I can attest to that, as I'm living it!  In signing up to the site, one has the option of choosing the level of interaction they wish with other members, including friendship, as well as the option of actually interacting with them.  I have had the good fortune of developing good, sincere exchanges with both men and women about celebrating our good memories and encouraging each other in forging ahead in an optimistic way!  I think there's a place for everyone, should someone not respect the terms and conditions of the site, there are administrative authorities to report to.  .  

[akakakes]

Amen ChaCha... and amen.. ..K

[blader712]

I COULD NOT AGREE MORE!
JUST BECAUSE MARRIED MEN POST, DOES NOT MEAN ALL OF THEM WANT TO JUMP IN BEDE WITH YOU.....

[BikerD]

I get the impression that all sites where people interact are going to have some men (and maybe women?) that are up to no good. However I agree that we should not tar everyone with the same brush. Quite often its a common hobby or interest that makes people click. Married or not does it matter? No of course not. I've been widowed and my ex went off with my pension fund but thats life and I've bounced back. Would enjoy swapping stories or recipes with a lady. Married or not.