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[anume57]

My beloved Momma is dying it is the hardest time of my life She has Vascular Dementia and Alzhemier's. She is leaving in pieces and and I am helpless !

[beachesca]

Anume57
I too lost my mother two years ago and it is a very hard thing to watch and go through. You wish you could do more for her, sitting and keeping her company seems to be all you can do. My only comfort when she was gone was to know now her suffering was over and she had a good life and was a truly good person.
My thoughts and good wishes are with you on your difficult journey.
Beaches ca

[IzzysGirl]

First, I am sorry for your troubles. Your pain comes thru loud and clear.I can empathize. My Mom is 88. My Dad died 25 yrs ago. She was always so very active: daily trips to the seniors club in the a.m. to her local legion branch in the afternoons, swimming 3x week and at least one cruise a year (yes she went solo, and never minded!) I always told her, when the topic came up, that my wish for her was that she die on the dance floor of a cruise ship on the way home. Alas, she returned from a cruise in June and a large, rapid growing mass took over her stomach region. By July it was confirmed it was cancer. By this time her petite frame was so distended she could not walk or put her shoes on. Finally it was decided to operate just to get rid of some of the bulk. prognosis not good. It is growing still and spreading rapidly. She is in an Assisted Living/Nursing Home. Something she always dreaded. She was told after surgery she had approx 2 months. That is a heavy blow. For the first month she just kept hoping it would be over soon. Now in month 2, she is weaker and so many other things to get one down, but the meds keep her pain free and she is finding joy, again, in every day. She is blessed to be in a wonderful facility with exceptional staff. I live in a different province but my sis and her kids are very present to her and she has tons of friends visiting. Until today, I always thought "if only I was there, I could make things better for her" but today we had such a great conversation, her telling me all the wonderful things that have happened lately, I finally believe what she has always said to me "even if you were here there is nothing you could do to make it better" . It can be devastating losing a parent. I cling to memories we made together.

[Minskore]

I lost both my parents within 8 months of each other (13 years ago). And the one thing I remember feeling, amidst the shock, and grief, was the sense of aloneness, I felt like an orphan....weird, I'm a grown woman and felt like a kid all alone in this world. Still do actually. I guess because I'm single and don't have kids, my parents were the two people in this world that I felt, if anything happened to me, I could always go to them, they'd be the ones who'd remember me, who'd notice if I wasn't here, etc. When they passed away, I felt completely alone in the world. I felt a deep sense of fear inside that no matter what happesn in my life, I'm all alone now, no one to share my milestones with, no one to go to for advice when i need it, etc. Neither of my parents suffered a long illness, both their deaths were fairly sudden....so I didn't really have the time to prepare myself mentally for the end or for the loss. I thought in time things would get better and I'd miss them less and less but the reality is, now 13 years later I still feel completely alone in this world and still feel the emptiness inside. people told me time would heal, I thought it would also, but in all honesty, for me it hasn't. I wake up everyday wishing I won't feel alone and empty in my life today, but it hasn't happened yet.